The Language of the Unheard
“learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed.” Isaiah 1:17
Dear Jesus,
Search my heart. I pray that it will break for the things that are breaking yours today and always. I pray that you will mold me into a listener and a peace maker. May you mold me with strength and courage to speak out against injustice as you have also done. Lead me in the way of strength and boldness in love. That I may fight the good fight through love. Let me see the hurting, broken and the injustice and have the faith and courage to do and say what is right. Allow me to show grace in love and also fight for what is right. Let me fight for injustice as you did.
Amen.
“Certain conditions continue to exist in our society, which must be condemned as vigorously as we condemn riots. But in the final analysis, a riot is the language of the unheard. And what is it that America has failed to hear? It has failed to hear that the plight of the Negro poor has worsened over the last few years. It has failed to hear that the promises of freedom and justice have not been met. And it has failed to hear that large segments of white society are more concerned about tranquility and the status quo than about justice, equality and humanity. And so in a real sense our nation’s summers of riots are caused by our nation’s winters of delay. And as long as America postpones justice, we stand in the position of having these recurrences of violence and riots over and over again. Social justice and progress are the absolute guarantors of riot prevention” -Martin Luther King Jr.
Read that again.
Let the words wash over you.
Lay down your pride and listen.
I wanted to start this whole post with some else’s words and someone else’s story. After all, that is what this post is all about. Voices that are longing to be heard, to be felt and to be understood. Voices that are coming from broken places that are worn and weary and praying for rest. Voices that are pleading with you and pleading with me to finally lay down our pride, open our eyes and ears to see and finally listen.
I don’t condone rioting, obviously.
More than that, I don’t condone murder.
I have seen it with my own eyes, heard it with my own ears and spoken against it with my own mouth. I have also had to be educated and learn from a place of humility and apologize when I was wrong. I have hugged crying friends who have been victims of racism and hate, I have held the hands of my brothers and sisters as they watched and felt hate and I have looked into the worn and weary eyes of friends and family who utter the same sentiment over and over… “It happens ALL. THE. TIME”
ENOUGH.
I am so sorry. I am sorry for the times I didn’t see what was right in front of me. I am sorry for the times I missed the opportunity to stand up for you. I am sorry for the times I lacked the courage to say what needed to be said. I am sorry for saying, “I don’t see color” as an excuse to not stand up for you, see you and value you. When I used that as a way to announce I wasn’t racist but lacked the understanding for the need to value your color, your history, your heart and your life. Today I want to see color, I want to celebrate that color, I want to value you that color and encourage others to do the same.
I see you, I value you and I Love you.
Black Lives Matter.
-One again I will remind you that of course all lives matter. That is not the point.
Saying that is like yelling “all houses matter” to the fireman standing in front of a burning house when yours is currently safe from the flames. Your house is not in danger. Of course your house matters, but the fireman need to focus on putting out the flames of your neighbors so that we can all be safe. Can we take the focus off ourselves please!
Today, I encourage you, if you are still screaming ‘All lives matter’ please, I beg of you, please read the following messages. Hear their hearts and pray about how to respond. Until it changes in our hearts we will never see change in the world. That’s what they have been fighting for.
** I have disabled the comments on this post. This is NOT a debate forum, this is NOT a place of judgement and this is CERTAINLY NOT a place for hate. What you are about to read are fresh from the hearts of my hurting brothers and sisters and I will tolerate ZERO judgment and hate. That is not what this is for. This is for digesting, understanding and maybe a little heart softening. This should not be used as ammo for debates but to be taken in and planted in your hearts and mind. I am wanting you to see people. Real. People. May we lay down our pride act a little more like Jesus. Until you have walked in their shoes, felt the pain they feel and the struggles they face you have NO right to Judge and your mouth should remain shut.
-First is my big brother Ed. Yupp, he is family. He is my brother and no on can tell me differently. ❤️
“I stayed overnight in downtown Boston a couple years back. First time ever. Also, WORST NIGHT OF SLEEP EVER. All the sounds of late-night city life blended together - the roaring ambulances, the screaming cop sirens, the clumsy drunkard dropping their bottle, the rumbling subway, the cars honking, the laughing passer-bys ,,,
But the most amazing part? When I realized that people actually sleep through it all. I mean, they do this NIGHTLY.
I was quickly reminded that, for many city-dwellers (along with those who can sleep on planes, trains, during storms, etc.), there is an amazing ability to simply forget about the noise. Literally, instead of focusing on the noise around them, they acknowledge that it is there and they choose to ignore it.
Believe it or not? Mind-blowing thought for me at the time. (I still can't sleep on planes.)
But this week? A very potent reminder of the long-term effects of our ability to choose to acknowledge
first and then disengage ...
You see, once we have selectively CHOSEN to acknowledge and then CHOSEN to ignore, those sounds that keep us awake? Harmless. Oh they are still there. But even more uncanny is how our minds will choose to ignore something when we become too accustomed to hearing it without engaging it ..
Consider this: after several nights at my friend’s apartment, I was actually sleeping. SOUNDLY. When i stopped being startled by the sound of the siren or the drunkard, when I stopped being surprised by the occurrence of these noises, they literally lost the power of impact.
Note that the noises didn’t go away. I acknowledged them but stopped engaging them. I stopped responding to them. i stopped trying to understand them. I stopped thinking "oh wow, I hope no one is hurt" or "does that person need help getting home?" or "I wonder which subway that was".
I allowed those noises to become "an everyday thing". They lost their sensation for me.
.......
So I believe it is with this concept of being heard. The danger within the over-use of this phrase is that, if we are not careful, we might misinterpret it to mean that WE - the noisemakers - need to find a better vehicle for our posts, or a louder voice at the press conference, or a different representative in government, or a new platform on social media, or a more sensational quote from a past leader …
When the bigger truth of the concept is this: being heard is as much, if not more so, about the LISTENER as it is about the SPEAKER (i.e., the noisemaker).
Note that I said "bigger" truth. Because when a speaker is heard (i.e. listened to), then it becomes a conversation. An exchange. And understanding increases.
................
We ignore train signals at railroad crossings, if only to avoid a delay. We ignore morning alarm clocks, if only to get more sleep. Many of our offices pipe in “white noise” as a form of sound masking (which is the addition of generated sound to mask unwanted sound … yeah, that’s its own lesson right there), and we ignore that for the sake of productivity. We work in front of the television. We write while listening to music.
Our choices to acknowledge but disengage from sounds are woven into our very lives.
Consider: being heard will change dramatically in our society when those to whom we are speaking finally CHOOSE to both acknowledge and engage us. To listen … and not just listen to reply, but listen to understand.
“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”
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-Next is a student I have music directed. Her name is Jadyn. ❤️
“Watching the state of our world right now has been incredibly heartbreaking, confusing, and filled with so many different emotions. My thoughts and feelings change by the hour. I’ve deleted Instagram and Facebook and have tried to distance myself from watching videos and things, not because I don’t care, but rather because I need time to think and I can’t handle seeing post after post of the same thing. I’ve read that people who don’t say anything or stay silent in times like these are complicit, but I will let whoever wants to think that, do so. I will not just repost something or change my profile picture because with all due respect, that’s not going to create change or erase the fact that people of color are being killed and profiled. With that being said though, I’m beyond privileged, being another reason I have kept my mouth shut. I’ve been raised in Anderson my whole life and have been fortunate for the most part to not have to deal with the struggles of many other African Americans. I have always done my best to educate my peers and other about how they can be inclusive in all ways. I think in some ways I’m lucky to have that power and ability to educate others. At the end of the day, it comes down to simply ignorance. As a society we do not have the education on diversity and inclusion and that’s a huge barrier in our social hierarchy. It stems from years of systemic racism and hardships that are irreversible. What we can do moving forward is seriously change our education systems and work protocols to teach others moving forward about how we can create an equal world. History repeats itself because no one is reversing the narrative. It’s as simple as celebrating one another for our cultures and backgrounds and changing the implicit bias and stereotypes we have not only on African Americans, but all people and genders as a whole. People are upset and need to grieve and I support that 1000%. I don’t condone destroying stores, fighting or protesting in a dangerous way, but at the same time, companies can rebuild, hearts can mend and we can push through this. No amount of damage could ever equate to the lives of so many individuals that were taken from us. This is a much needed wake up call and sometimes things have to get messy before they can be mended.”
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I met Nicole at a singing competition. She is the Strongest and coolest woman ever. ❤️
“As a mother of a black boy and a wife of a black man, I’m heartbroken.
My husband works hard to provide for our family and the thought that he could be killed by someone who has taken an oath to protect and serve is beyond indescribable.
My son simply wants to graduate high school, hang out with his friends both black and white, play basketball on the high school court and hopefully on the next level (college), and yet if someone who has taken an oath to protect him sees him as a threat, I could be buying a casket and burial plot instead of gym shoes.
It’s beyond description!”
Nicole McWhorter
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—Next is a former student of mine.❤️ Her family is my all time favorite. They are INCREDIBLE people. She has one of the purest hearts I have seen.
“ Quite honestly when all this started I was still very pessimistic. I’ve heard about cases like these for years, but there have been a lot more in recent years. I’ve been so scared for my family, especially when I’m away from home. my brother and sister are still young so I mainly worry about my dad. There have been multiple times that he has been pulled over and when the cop approached him, the cop couldn’t really articulate why he was pulled over. My heart has sunk every time something like that has happened. The fear never really goes away, but these things happen so often that you get used to living in fear. This is why I was initially pessimistic that I would see any change to this blatant racism in my lifetime. But this movement and all the support I’ve seen in the past few months (and especially the past week) has begun to turn my mood around. Seeing all the people who support us has made me feel like there is a chance for change in the near future. It has made me realize I don’t have to settle for living in fear. It has made me realize how many people are on our side, and are willing to put themselves at risk to right these injustices. I am so sorry and saddened that it took this many people, good people, losing their lives to kickstart this movement, but in their honor we are fighting for the lives of black Americans present and future. I have hope for the first time in my life that we can affect change. Thank you to you all the people standing by our side. I hope this all made sense and I’m sorry for kinda word vomiting but you’re welcome to any of this and I hope that it gave you the view you were looking for. I miss you too and I hope that you and your beautiful family are doing well ❤️”
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This is a heart sister of mine from college. We have supported each other through college, we have encouraged each other in motherhood , in life and now I stand with her and her fight!! She explains of a situation with her daughter that broke my heart. I love you Des. ❤️
I have not felt unheard by my white friends. But I have had racist encounters with my white friends present and I have been noticeably hurt and I was told by my white friends, that it was not that, your just thinking that. Instead of being sympathetic because they don’t experience it and have told themselves it doesn’t exist. Then my feelings have been completely brushed off like I’m making it up in my head. So I feel like I’m over reacting or making something a bigger deal than it is. So instead I suppress those feelings until I can talk to my family members about it so I can get it out and express my hurt and figure out how to move forward with their support and encouraging words.
How white friends can support me? Allow your kids to see more than one color. Toys and tv shows specifically. Allow diversity in all aspects of your life. Create genuine and meaningful relationships with people outside of your race. Aniyah last year at the age of 3 was called the n word in preschool by another 3 year old. It tore me up and I wanted to share and talk about it but I was so hurt and angry that Eric and I just expressed to each other and talked to the teachers and school. It was brushed off and tears were shed by the teachers and the little girls parents but it was just sad that Aniyah had heard that word. Thank you for reaching out.
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I think one of the other hardest conversations I had was with my brothers and sisters who didn’t have the words to explain how they were feeling, again. When I talk to people I received this statement from a majority of my friends, “I would love to add my voice to this, but I am too worn to put all of this into writing. I am too tired of it all to even express how heartbroken I feel.”
I will never understand, but I will stand with you.
There is a lot of craziness happening in the world right now. If I hear the words ‘uncertain times’ one more time I may lose my mind! However the reason I may lose it is because it’s true. These are uncertain times. The ground is shifty and we are all clinging to things that we all believe to be the truth.
In times that are uncertain the one thing that helps me is looking at Jesus, His heart, His ministry and His message.
I think this time in the world is a perfect opportunity for the church and believers to step up and show Jesus. The problem is that we are all too busy arguing points and standing on pedestals screaming our own opinions to hear the cries of our brothers and sisters. Something needs to change. We need to be the change. Yes, I know that there has been looting and rioting and violence, but what would it look like if instead of pointing fingers at whoever you think is guilty we started asking how we can help? We started praying with our brothers and sisters, walking with our brothers and sister and serving them. What if we cared less that your neighbor believes something different than you and focused on serving that neighbor. Is it more important for you to win that argument on Facebook or to love someone who has a different opinion than you?
I know the phrase “WWJD” (what would Jesus do) is technically archaic, but does the message not ring true today? If you are truly trying to bring people to Jesus do you think showboating your beliefs and stubbornly clutching to your political stance is the way to do it? Jesus sat down at tables to eat with and love on people from all different walks of life. He was relational and He was love. I often wonder if His ministry started today where do you think you would find Him?
Matthew 22:36
“Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”
37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself. 40
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
All of the laws hangs on these two commands. All of them. Love God and love people. Did you notice that He didn’t actually specify what people we are supposed to love? He said to love people. Love your neighbor, even if they don’t look, talk, act, vote or love like you. Love them.
Before you post on social media, before you get into an argument at the grocery store and before you judge someone take a minuet and ask yourself what is more important…. to win the argument or to show love, to show grace and MAYBE, just maybe, show Jesus.
Your life and your words may be the only bible someone will ever read.
Does the feel heavy? It should.
People are hurting. Your neighbors have been crying out for a long time. When will we listen? When will we walk with them? When will you help them carry their load? When will we show them how to lay their burdens at the feet of Jesus?
There is life and power in the tongue.
“Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45 ESV
“For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” Luke 6:45 NIV
“Death and life are in the power of the tongue” Proverbs 18:21
I think it’s time to listen & I think its time to love.
XOXO, KB
